| It has been eight months since my husband’s death and I am finally coming out of the fog. I look back and wonder how did I do it. I look back and wonder why did I have to. I learned things and wondered why. It was sudden and it was blurred. The rush of people, paramedic, police, CSI and coroner. The calls to family how do you say he died at 49. My son is brave, too brave? I am stronger now. Probably stronger than I have been in 21 years. I am now looking for a job, a difficult task and yet I feel confident. Confidence amazing! I can’t think about the future but am learning to live in the now. This year is almost over and I am so glad. What will next year bring? Can I look forward? Not yet. I need to live now until I find my normal. Till I find me. |
